Smaller Circle of Friends

If you look at your life right now, would you say that you’re happy with it? Have you achieved your dreams? 

Do you feel like you’re tired mentally and on the brink of losing hope? Maybe it’s because you keep hanging around and listening to toxic people. 

I was close friends with toxic people in the past. I thought their toxicity was normal mistakes that anyone could make. So I put myself in their shoes and thought to myself that if I were them, I did not want to be judged by the mistakes that I have done.

The problem was I couldn’t differentiate between a mistake and toxic behavior.

Mistakes happen unintentionally and people can always change and do better in the future.

Toxicity is when people do bad things over and over again and think that it’s okay even others are hurt by them. Being in a relationship or friendship with toxic people make you question your self-worth and your life purposes.

You will realize that every time you hang around them, you feel bad about yourself and your energy is drained.

No one is perfect. I am still making mistakes until today and I realize this. But I want to be a better person and live a better life. And if I want to be better, I can’t keep hanging around with toxic people.

They are not developing themselves and being with them makes you stop going further because they want to keep you at the same level as them. If possible, even lower.

Upon this realization, my circle of friends has been getting smaller.

Slowly I started limiting my interactions and conversations with toxic people. Liars, cheaters, manipulators, controlling people, lazy people who don’t develop themselves, and jealous people who discuss other people instead of ideas. 

But the most toxic of all are fake friends.

These are people who won’t tell you if you’re about to do something stupid or career-damaging. They won’t say anything because they don’t want to hurt your feelings. Or maybe they secretly hope that you will make those mistakes so they will feel that they are better than you are. 

Evaluate your life and where you are going in the future. If you don’t think that they are going in the same direction, why are you spending so much time with them in the present? 

You should be spending time developing new skills and building your dreams. Because life is short and you don’t know how much time you’ve got left.

I will leave you thinking deeper about this. Please take your time to listen to my favorite motivational speaker, Les Brown. In this video below, he’s talking about the importance of removing negative people from your life.

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Written by dearmarintan

An Indonesian who enjoys coffee, books, and meaningful conversations. Currently interested in body language, communication, and human behavior.


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